Forever Loved (Forever Lost Book 2) Read online

  The beat kicked in again and the lights returned, but Cassie was lost under Leo’s spell. Her powerful man, who had remained masterful in all things, was the only person in the entire club. Leo had become her haven, and she basked in the warmth of his body and the unspoken promises behind his eyes.

  “I love you,” she whispered, leaning up onto her tiptoes to give him another kiss.

  “You’re everything to me, Cassie. Everything,” he replied, gripping her waist and pulling her closer. “I’d die if I lost you again.”

  “Then let’s make sure you don’t.” They kissed and clung to one another while the song burst to life around them. Cassie could hear the lyrics now, and grinned up at him when he finally pulled away.

  “I’ll be your Casanova, your Romeo. You’ll be my Juliet, don’t tell me no.” Base throbbed in her chest, along with her heart. “Mr. Smooth,” she teased, but loved his choice of song.

  When they’d had enough of the crowded dance floor, the pair slid effortlessly through the crowd back toward the VIP area. Leo’s commanding presence alone seemed to be enough to part the sea of writhing bodies, and Cassie was proud to be on the magnificent man’s arm. Their night out wasn’t anything like when Victor had taken her to his club back in Mexico. She’d been nothing but a trophy he was showing off to his minions that night, and she felt more like a whore than he’d ever treated her before or after. Cassie had worn what he’d instructed and acted as he’d demanded, but still Victor had belittled and humiliated her in front of his men.

  She shook off the memory by force, and grinned when they reached their table and found Siobhan and José waiting for them.

  “Hey, you made it,” she cried, hugging her new friend before accepting a kiss on the cheek from the man she still found hard to trust. There was something about José that simply didn’t add up. She’d heard him talking in Spanish, and it was the right dialect for the European language rather than the South American variation, but every now and again she was sure she heard it slip. Cassie told herself countless times she must be imagining it. That she was probably distrustful of all strange men—not just those with accents that sent her mind reeling with past trauma. For Siobhan’s sake, she had to force the mistrust away, or at least hide it to stop from hurting her feelings. Cassie couldn’t bear it if she alienated her dear friend over such a senseless reason as her having a Spanish boyfriend.

  They chatted for a while and Cassie settled her thoughts, enjoying herself as the drinks flowed and she relished the company of her friends. She was safe here, not only under the watchful eye of her protective lover but with Roger and the others close by too. Trust had to be earned, but she chose to give José the benefit of the doubt until he’d earned her trust fully. Siobhan had already earned it, and she’d vouched for him, so that had to mean something.

  “Well, we have some news,” Siobhan said, squirming excitedly in her seat. “José proposed!” She thrust her hand in Cassie’s face, showing off a glittering diamond that Cassie was surprised she hadn’t already noticed. She leapt out of her seat and hugged her friend tightly, while Leo congratulated José on their engagement.

  “I’m so happy for you,” she told them as she accepted a fresh glass of champagne from Leo. “Cheers.” They all clinked glasses with wide smiles. “So, any plans on dates or venues?”

  “I said I’d quite like to elope,” Siobhan replied, leaning into José as he wrapped a loving arm around her. “Maybe with just a couple of good friends there to be our witnesses…that’s you two, in case you were wondering.”

  “What?” Cassie was taken aback, yet honored. “It’d be wonderful to be there with you guys, of course!”

  “Phew, she was hoping you’d agree,” José chimed in with a gentle smile. “I said what about the Bahamas, or Mexico?”

  “No!” both Leo and Cassie shouted at the same time, shocking the groom-to-be with their outburst. Leo recovered quickly, laughing off their reaction.

  “It’s just, everyone does that. It’s too obvious,” he said. “What about Mauritius or Thailand? I know some great places.”

  “Yeah, I told you the US wasn’t a great idea. Visas and stuff can be a nightmare,” Siobhan agreed, covering for them. Cassie was pleased to discover she hadn’t told her fiancé about her and Leo’s past or that they weren’t allowed back into the States, but could tell he was still suspicious.

  “Anyway, there’s plenty of time for all that. Tonight, we’re celebrating!” Cassie told them with a grin, glad to have the chance to change the subject.

  Leo pressed his lips to her temple and slipped an arm around her waist. He then pulled her further into the seclusion of the booth while their lovesick companions headed to the dance floor.

  “Would you ever do it again, with me, obviously?” he whispered in her ear.

  “Wow, what a romantic proposal,” Cassie teased, but her smile let him know she wasn’t being serious. “No, I don’t want to get married again. As much as I’d love to be your wife, I don’t want to jinx what we’ve got.” This time she absolutely meant it. Leo was clearly disheartened, but Cassie knew he understood her reasons why, and was glad when he didn’t push her on it.

  “Okay, just let me know if you change your mind. The ball’s in your court, love.”

  “It always is,” she answered him playfully, before jumping up and heading back to the dance floor. Leo finished his drink, and then followed behind her with a sly smile. Feeling his eyes on her, Cassie swayed her hips as she walked. Before she even reached their friends, his hands were on her, pulling her into him.

  “I can’t wait to get you home,” his voice growled in her ear. “You won’t be able to sit down for a week when I’m done with you.”

  Cassie grinned and arched back into him. She knew he wasn’t joking, but couldn’t wait either.

  Chapter Six

  “You’re doing so well in our sessions. Why aren’t you making more progress at home, Leo?” Mrs. Jones, the psychiatrist, watched intently from behind her square glasses. Her hand was poised, as always, to write down his answer, and he despised her for asking. It might be her job to determine his state of mind, but Leo hated that it gave her permission to pry into his personal life.

  “I can’t offload my shit onto Cassie, I just can’t. She doesn’t even know I come here.” Leo rolled his eyes. “I’m a monster, plain and simple. I’ve hurt people, used and abused them, and then thrown them away when I’d had enough. I already dragged her into my crazy once before, and I can’t do it again.”

  “Then why not just tell her that? Explain to Cassie how you feel about yourself and the past? It’ll help you accept the changes you’re going through as well as make her understand your transition better.”

  “I’ve killed people, and I’m not talking about a long time ago. I don’t want her knowing what a cold, heartless murderer I became after she tore my world apart. I don’t care about anyone anymore, and it scares me. There’s only one. It’s a single purpose I have in this entire world, and that’s Cassie. I live and breathe because she needs me to. I function and survive, because she needs me to. I love with all my heart, because she loves me.” Leo knew he was ranting, but it was all scarily true.

  “There’s no need to try and convince me you’re an obsessive sociopath, Mr. Solomon. I already know that,” Mrs. Jones said. “You cannot fool me, and I don’t believe for a second that you’re fooling her. Open up, what’s the worst that can happen?”

  “She’ll leave me again.”

  “That might happen anyway, it’s only a matter of time.” The pity in her smile made Leo want to trash her perfectly laid out office. “Our hour’s up. See you next week, Mr. Solomon.”

  Leo left the psychiatrist’s office with a scowl. He tried hard to lock down those emotions again, and cursed again how as part of his parole he’d agreed to attend regular sessions with the shrink. He was happier just letting it all go, but Mrs. Jones had to drag it all up again week after week. Cassie didn’t need to know ho
w fucked up he was. That is, if she hadn’t already figured it out, of course.

  The mixed emotions stayed with him as he stalked through the crowded street back to his casino, and he let the flow of people guide him. Leo had learned soon after beginning the sessions to walk there and back. He wasn’t much company until he’d calmed down, and didn’t want anyone from his office to see beneath his cool, hard shell. Leo was pretty certain that the time spent walking by himself was actually as necessary as the session itself.

  His mind was racing. Might Mrs. Jones be right? All that he said and did was meticulously planned and orchestrated, but lots of people were like that. He was a control-freak. Could it really be a matter of time before he ruined everything and broke Cassie’s heart again? He couldn’t be that guy who opened up to his girl about each and every emotion he had. He certainly wasn’t the type to sit up all night talking about his past and crying on her shoulder about it. Every time an emotion welled inside, he quashed it. That’d always been his nature, and what did it matter if it made him an obsessive sociopath, as Mrs. Jones had delightfully put it? He’d cared about others when it truly mattered.

  She was wrong anyway. As far as Leo was concerned he couldn’t be a sociopath. He had empathy and remorse for the things he’d done—but only when it came to Cassie. Everyone else meant nothing to him, it was only her. That’s something else entirely, an obsessive sociopath with only the one catalyst. What a lucky girl she is to have you fixating over her day and night.

  Leo shook off his antagonizing thoughts, not caring that he was a mess. He could still love with every fiber of his being. He could still put another person before himself at every turn. Everything Leo had done since getting off the plane from New York had been for Cassie, and he didn’t intend on ever stopping.

  Romance and affection he could do easily. Picnics in the park, movies and date nights were effortless. He’d made it his mission to fill Cassie’s world with laughter and love, and watching her smile was the only reward he needed. Well, then there was the sex. Leo’s heart beat fast even thinking about their lovemaking, and he had to adjust himself in his pants just envisioning how different she was now.

  Cassie had truly been awakened since they’d last been together, and he loved how they’d not only rekindled their physical love for one another, but started a fire so strong it was now unstoppable. He still couldn’t believe she’d made the moves on him that very first night he’d come back. She was so confident, beautiful, and incredibly sexy. He’d gone weak at the knees just catching sight of her wearing nothing but his jacket over her tiny, perfectly curvaceous frame. At the time, he hadn’t remotely expected their physical relationship to begin again so quickly, but had adored her eagerness for more, and remembered that night with a smile.

  There still was one aspect that’d been a hard realization recently. He’d thought for a long time that she’d learned to own her past and had moved on, but now he knew she was far from it. When he’d first met Cassie years ago, she’d been haunted by the monstrous memory of Jonah, the addiction-addled husband who had mutilated her body while out of his mind. How she’d let him stay in her life was beyond Leo’s comprehension, and she’d insisted all along she wasn’t a victim—when clearly that’s exactly what she was. Cassie had made Leo wait so long to be with her that it’d driven him crazy. He still hated that he’d used a whore to satisfy those needs she couldn’t, but that was in the past. There was only one woman for him now, and he knew he’d never so much as look at another one again.

  Cassie hadn’t really moved on from being that timid girl she once was. Only her monster had changed. The metaphorical dog that bit her and made her scared to pet another one had turned into a wolf, and he’d hunted her and preyed on every one of Cassie’s weaknesses. Victor was that wolf. Leo knew he had to have genuinely fallen in love with her, or else he would’ve never married and protected her the way he did. When he’d taken Cassie away, it was to be a whore, and they’d all known it. However, something had changed, and Leo still didn’t truly know exactly how or why Victor had altered his plans for her. But, that obsessive love had been his undoing in the end, and they’d all lost something along the way.

  Yes, Cassie no longer trembled and hid her scars from him, but Leo had been forced to see for himself that it wasn’t because she’d overcome them. It was because the scars now ran deeper than simply on her skin. She was riddled with them inside and out, just like he was, and he hoped that despite his downfalls, he could be the one to help her overcome the past.

  Together they’d move on and be happy. Leo relied on her for that at least. His only chance at redemption was to die knowing he’d done everything he could to make things right by Cassie. The empire he’d built in New York, and that which he was cultivating in London, meant nothing, whereas they had once meant everything to him. Leo still wanted wealth and power, those needs were in his blood, but only if he got to share them with Cassie.

  Coming to a stop, he steadied himself, took a deep breath, and then pushed through the doors to his huge casino. With his icy demeanor back in place, Mr. Solomon headed straight upstairs to get back to business.

  ***

  Cassie waited patiently for Leo in his office, having been assured by Brian that he’d be back in no time. It’d been almost an hour. As far as she knew he didn’t have anywhere else to be other than the casino, though, and Cassie was growing impatient. Part of her thought about quizzing him when he got back, but she was loathe to turn into that girlfriend who wanted to know where he was and what he was doing all the time.

  When he stormed in and almost threw his jacket onto the coat stand, Cassie flinched. He seemed colder and more distant than ever. Leo was hiding under not just his normal layers of closed-off indifference, but an extra few for some reason.

  He jumped when he caught sight of her on the sofa, reading through a manuscript she’d been sent—her newest project. Cassie tried her best to stay relaxed, and she smiled over at him. She began gathering up her things, sensing the tension rolling off him, figuring it might not be a good time to visit after all.

  “Hey, I thought I’d stop by and see if you wanted to grab a bite to eat, but…”

  “Sorry, love. I’ve been out.” She wanted to roll her eyes and point out that he was stating the obvious, but stopped herself. Cassie went over to him and stared up into his hard face. The lines seemed deeper, and his eyes held no warmth. She didn’t like the man standing before her, it wasn’t her Leo. “I’m too distracted tonight. How about we do it another time?” he offered.

  “Okay.” She smiled, despite her hatred for the big, bad gangster persona he was wearing. Cassie never had been a fan of Mr. Solomon, and wasn’t too disgruntled at being dismissed from his presence. “I’ll go and meet Shiv for drinks instead.”

  He agreed and let her go with nothing more than a chaste kiss on her cheek. Normally, she’d wrap her arms around him and wait for the calm, gentle Leo to return, but this time she was more than ready to get away from the closed-off man she knew wouldn’t answer her questions. She had no idea what was eating him, and guessed he wasn’t about to enlighten her.

  Cassie left the casino, and was glad to be out of there. She had to shake off the memory of his soulless stare. He still hid so much away, and she hated the unpredictability of him.

  She called Siobhan and arranged to meet her at a bar just around the corner from her apartment, then hailed a cab. She rang Roger as well, informing him of the change in her plans. He wasn’t impressed to hear she’d left the casino without a chaperone.

  “Leo let you leave without checking you were covered?” he barked down the line. She could hear the rustling of him presumably dressing while maintaining their call. “Go back to the lobby and wait for me.”

  “Too late, I’m already in the cab,” she informed him, and heard him curse. “Meet me at the bar, okay?” Cassie added before ending the call. She spent the cab journey checking her emails and messages, keen for a distraction from the
memory of the pain in Leo’s eyes, or his eagerness to get rid of her. She had to wonder where he’d been or with who. It had to be someone who had the power to chill him so effectively. It hadn’t been his cousin; Brian was at the casino with her. God, she wanted Leo to dig deeper, and hated knowing she probably wouldn’t get him to even if she begged him.

  When she reached their chosen venue, McGill’s Irish Bar, she hovered outside, looking for her friends. Cassie suddenly felt an icy chill sweep over her, and she peered up and down the street. It was busy enough that she felt safe, but something still made her feel uneasy. It was as though she was being watched.

  “Hey,” José’s kind voice called from across the street. He crossed over to join her when the traffic slowed. “Are we the first ones here?” Cassie guessed Siobhan must’ve invited him along. She didn’t mind, but in all honesty she’d wanted some girl time to discuss her closed-off man with her friend in confidence. Cassie nodded and accepted a kiss on the cheek from Siobhan’s fiancé in greeting, once again pushing her doubts about him aside. He’d sensed them, though, and evidently decided it was time to address her unease. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you, so it’s good we’ve got a minute,” José said, and her heart lurched.

  “Let me guess, you’re not quite who you say you are?” she jumped in, unable to bite her tongue. José looked shocked, but his smile stayed on.

  “Yeah, I suppose so,” he answered. “Listen, I do work in the city center, but I travel a lot more than I can talk about. My job has taken me to many, ah…obscure places.”